Because I do, I really do. I appreciate people who are friendly and create nice atmosphere in the workplace. Time goes quicker, it's way more interesting to do the monotonic job and in general, it's just nice to be around nice people. I was super impressed by how friendly I've been accepted by my colleagues.
I mean, not all of them, but who cares about the ones who are negative, right? I'm afraid to sound racist, because I really hope that I am not, but Indian men are so... repulsive? Is that the word you use when someone just doesnt attract you? Like, one tried to flirt with me and basically manipulate me into doing something with him, the second one keeps staring while I'm working and tells everyone he wants to take me out. That's honestly the only reason I say to people I have a boyfriend, because I don't need that constant 'go out with me' shit. It's really bad, that I have to lie, right? I don't feel good about it, but hey, if that makes my life better, I don't mind.
I was told I'm super chill. This one person whom I really enjoy working besides said he was trying to piss me off for two hours and I just didn't care. He said he likes that about me. Well, I like that too. I will not let anyone to piss me off if I won't want to piss off on someone (confusing sentence alert??) anyway, yes, my new job is going great so far, the only thing I regret is that I can't make it there and club at the same time, so I had to reduce my hours at the nightclub. Hopefully I'll come back for good when uni starts :3
Oh, and continuing on the Indian men topic, is it just me, or someone else also noticed that all/most of them wont even try to be a girls friend, they go straight to 'yeah, so I'm rich, I have so many degrees and a house' or smth and all it tells me is that he is a freaking show off. I really dont want to be rude, its just after some time it just became automatic for me to get really careful around them. White boys, on the other side, is another deal. Like, I don't know why, but I can admire others but I will initially be more attracted to Lithuanians. Is that bad? I mean, in my country we don't have many foreigners and I was living in a village where everyone was pretty racist and it seemed pretty normal. I grew up believing that another race is something I should be avoiding at all costs. Maybe that's why I'm like that? Anyway, don't want to upset anyone, I'm really sorry if what I've posted here insults anyone. It's just when I came to England, everyone is so different, so.... free? Like, in Lithuania, when I told my family I might be bisexual, they laughed at me. I haven't met anyone not straight in my first 18 years. I only saw few other race people and it was mainly because some 'stupid girls' from our village got married to them. And I came here and I'm getting called rude because Im not sure how everything works. Oh my God I still can't explain to my family what non-binary person is. Dont even get me started about the whole lgbt community, they just dont get it. In my country it's looked down at. For being open minded and saying that a person can do whatever the hell it wants with his life I was like a black sheep in my family. Even my friends would tell me to stop being stupid, that I was crazy and etc. I grew up in that environment and I really, I really try to be a nice, understanding person. I have so much to learn. Another thing which struck me is how you have to be careful about your clothing here. Not as in don't show your ankle or smth, but my friend saw a nice dress, but she didn't buy it because it had African ornaments on it an she said she didn't want to offend African people. To be fair, I've never thought about it. Even now, I wore this thing similar to Indian clothing to the club and no one told me anything. Like, was that bad? What if I do like that clothing? Is that discrimination against me then? Honestly, this free world is so confusing and sometimes all I want to do is go back to my tiny village where no one has ever heard of something called offending someone's persona. It's just so strange for me....
Anyway, gonna finish my tea and get to bed, I gotta wake up so early for work :((
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