Ok, I'm not sitting here naked. I wear my underwear, that means I do have some kind of clothes on me, doesn't it? And I have a blanket on my shoulders, so no one can see my boobs. And the curtains, obviously, are closed. God I love this. Have I told you how much I am inlove with my body? That sounds so narcissistic, sorry.
All day I was researching what is bisexuality, so you can imagine what kind of ideas I had in my mind all day. Oh, yeah, and so you wouldn't be confused, it was because of my final assignment for creative writing. We have to write a 2000 words piece creating someones identity or portfolio. So I chose a character who is bisexual but still is not quite sure about it. It was quite interesting to write it and now I sit here, trying to make a draft out of my piece and.. yeah, I'm on my blog. Fun times, fun times.
Anyway, I don't really want to talk about my uni work, it kills me everyday now. I don't even know what I want to talk about.
Oh, right, I was almost hit yesterday. Some guys decided it's really cool way to pick a girl by stopping their car just a few centimetres away from her. Poor choice, idiots. I saw them laughing and I really wanted to stop there and just stand in front of their car for a few good minutes, but I had to go to work, so they got off easily. God I wish I've done it. Stupid idiots. It got me thinking, actually. About my life. I'm not going deep into philosophical stuff, because that's boring, but let me tell you this, I found myself doing a list of what I want to do before I die. And since it made me realise that it might be any day, I wanna start to fulfil it asap. First, obviously, is to have sex. No one wants to die a virgin. Second one - tell everyone what I think of them. And this one is quite mean, because we all know how mean I can get. And to be honest with you, it's quite hard to think of something that doesn't require a lot of planning or time. I mean, obviously I want to finish uni, but if someone hits me tomorrow, that's unfulfilled wish, right? I want to have a list with wishes that I can grant any day. Any ideas?
Either way, I think all I want to do right now is to live. Not just exist. And as I previously said, I don't want relationship, so I shouldn't be spending time with guy that wants that. No, I don't find myself attracted to him in romantic way and as much as it kills me, whenever I get a text now I just want to cry. I mean, he's caring and stuff, but I don't like that. If I say I don't want to see anyone, that means I don't want to see anyone and if you try to push it, I'm gonna absolutely ignore you. And I know that's not how it happens, but that's how I work. I ignore everyone I don't fancy. Stupid, I know.
By the way, I have a freaking dilemma about next year. I love my girls so so much, but I can't remember the last time I talked with them. I can't remember the last time I went somewhere with them. I can't remember the last time we had a party. And I'm going to live with them next year. But I don't even know them anymore? I see their snapchats or facebook pictures and they hang out with different people, I hang out with absolutely different people and everything seems so... far? I don't know. I feel strange about this. And I had a dream one night that I was living with my guys and it was so freaking fun. Plus, they know how to cook and it's so perfect. Though it does sound strange living with a lot of guys and be the only girl in the house.
Anyway, I'm not bothering my blog anymore, I should get back to my assignment ^-^
have a nice evening xx
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