I know I haven't posted in a while, I really wanted to, but never got around to do it.
I guess I can start with the terrible friday that I had. Like, my Brother scared the shit out of me when he called me before work crying about being alone (he's with his dad atm). Like, I'm not going to talk about the whole situation, but I felt so helpless and I hated it. So yeah, you can imagine I wasn't in the best mood at the start of work. I mean, it got a bit better afterwards because I knew my brother was taking care of by one of our aunties. Anyway. The very same night I slipped on the stairs. Now, it might sound fun, because it's not the first time I'm being clumsy, but when I slipped and slided down, I kicked a guy and he fell on my legs. Like, both of them. Now, on Wednesday I hit my leg pretty hard in the stage at work, so you can imagine how much it hurt to have like 90kg fall on the same bruise. I have to admit, it hurt more on the other leg and I genuinely thought it broke. I had a small panic attack, obviously, so I went to the bathroom and had a little cry. Then I got back upstairs, put some ice on and everything, but my bosses sent me home cuz I could barely walk and it hurt everywhere and it was just a nightmare being on my feet.
But that's not where the adventure ends. I get home, right? I got home, my housemates are awake, we have a bit of a chat when suddenly we can hear people next door shouting. Have in mind, we know that they have four kids. Five, seven minutes passed and they were still shouting and screaming at each other. Then we heard a bang and the woman started shouting 'please get off of me' so we called the police. They came over in like two minutes and we thought that was it. We all went to bed, but like half an hour later the same couple started fighting outside the house. Personally, I didn't hear it, I was sound asleep by then, but my housemates said they called police again (or they wanted to? sorry, can't remember).
Anyway, I woke up on Saturday morning and my leg was just all swollen up and hurting, so I had to go to a&e because my auntie scared me to death that I might have ripped the muscle or something. Well, I was told it was fine and it should pass in a couple of days. I do feel better now, but I still cringe whenever someone touches my legs. And on top of that, I'm guessing from the fall, I have a lot of bruises on my body. And it feels like I've been in the gym for a day or so doing intensive training. You know the feeling, right?
And on top of all of this, yesterday I had a guy saying he likes me. You guys know me, right? If someone says that to me, they immediately will get ignored and I will pretend I have no idea who they are because that shit scares me to death. I mean, I met him once, I saw him a couple of times at my work with other students, we chat a bit on facebook, but that's about it. And you guys know that I get scared stupidly quickly so now I ignore him. He sent me like 3 snapchats yesterday and one just recently and I can't be bothered to open it. I know it's stupid but that is a fucking big thing for me, ok?
There is a photographer at work as well and even my boss thinks he fancies me and he told me I flirt with him, but honestly, I am not. I don't know what flirt is, I just do whatever I feel like doing. I'm probably going to end up alone with my 36 cats. And don't say 'poor cats' because I love cats more than I love myself.
Gosh I need a break from this. I'm trying to get over from one of the major crushes that I have and it's working little by little. And like yesterday's 'I like you' made me scared again and I couldn't stop thinking about my crush all night and that just made it so much worse because I really wanted to call him and ask him what he's up to. And I obviously didn't do it, because reasons. Just... just.... be careful with me, I'm fragile. My feelings are not the most stable thing at the moment and just drop a bomb like that is not ok.
Lots of love xx
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